COUPLE SESSION
Couple sessions support two people in a partnership that want to improve their relating together, either to come closer or to deal with specific issues in the coupleship.
Issues can consist of too much fighting or a lack of connection, and not knowing how to break through such patterns; it can be a lack of feeling heard, seen or understood and not knowing how to communicate clearly together or in such a way that you feel both satisfied; one partner may be missing closeness while the other wants to do their ‘own thing’ and both may feel not able to reach the other.
Often the result over time can be that the partners each feel lonely or rather invaded, maybe too much demanded upon, or both. The trust between the partners can get eroded, fights may be piling hurt upon hurt and this further weakens the bonding between the partners. The integrity of the partnership then is endangered.
In the couple session we start with assessing what is the issue and what have been the results upon the different elements that are needed for healthy relating; for instance what is the measure of trust currently in the partnership, what is the communication like, how is the closeness and intimacy, etc. We identify the issues, and the baggage that each of the partners brings individually to the relationship that may add to the issues.
We define what it is that is needed for healthy relating and healthy bonding; you experience what it means to respond from vulnerability rather than to react, to listen rather than blame and to say ‘I acknowledge..’ rather than ‘but you did…’ and ‘I need…’ rather than ‘you never..’
When we have a clear picture we can together agree upon the best appraoch to work through the issues and move towards growth, ownership, turning towards each other rather than away, and much more in the path to healing and fulfillment.
Through couple sessions and sometimes also individual sessions with each partner as needed, we address the identified issues. The couple may need to build trust once again, to move towards healthy bonding or even know what that means, will come to understand oneself and the other on a deeper level, will learn to open to compassion for each other while staying connected with oneself and maintain healthy boundaries, and ultimately restoring emotional safety if it has been lost. Also we will be teaching skills that may not have been innate like fighting fare, conscious loving, using love-maps, and others.